This blog is about polyamory, queerness, and sex positivity -- I will chronicle my musings, opinions, advice, adventures, and misadventures in open relationships and exploring my gender and sexuality. Come along for the ride!

Your Host:
I am an early 20's polyamorous queer and genderqueer sometimes-ladyish person looking to create a society of understanding and acceptance of polyamory and sex positivity. Since most people are either unaware, unsupportive, or have misconceptions of polyamory, this blog is critical. And awesome. And will definitely make you smile. That's what really matters in the world, right? Right.

The most important thing about this blog is that it's here not just for me, but for you. With such a small (but growing!) polyamorous community online, it's important that we advocate for each other and speak up. This is my way of doing so. Please feel free to ask me questions or request topics for me to speak on.

[And peruse the links below for a better understanding of what Polycule is all about.]

 

Anonymous asked
So, what do I say to a cute guy who doesn't know I have a boyfriend yet? He's a friend of a friend and I think he likes me and I like him, too. However, I'm in the closet about my polyamory, so...

1. “Hey Jonipher, do you wanna grab coffee later this week? I’d love to hang out with you.” Jonipher is all up on that idea, and then when you’re having oodles of fun drinking coffee together, you’re like “hey Jonipher listen. This is going great and all, with the coffee and the fun and the playing footsie under the table, but have you heard of polyamory? Basically, I’m in a relationship but we are both free to see other people and I don’t want to get too much into it because hey this is just coffee and footsie but I just wanted you to know because you seem like I want to have sex with you a cool guy so I thought you should know where I stand.”

2. “Hey Jonipher are you Mormon, because I am all about the plural marriages. No just kidding it’s not a Mormon thing but yeah polyamory bro.”

3. “Hey Jonipher remember that time I made that joke about having two boyfriends [you have to make a joke about having two boyfriends before you do this]? Yeah I know it was hilarious right? I know I know I’m so funny oh stop it Jonipher! Anyway yeah it wasn’t a joke. Wanna date?”

4. Any or all combinations of the above. There is no one right way to approach this topic with a friend, relative, or future partner. Just do what feels right. As you can tell, I like to use funny things to break the potential awkwardness, but that doesn’t work for everyone, especially people who aren’t funny. I think the best bet for most people is just to start a casual conversation about what relationships mean to each of you, and it’s a perfect opportunity for you to explain why you are polyamorous, and it’ll create a conversation in which Jonipher will understand where you’re coming from before you guys jump into a relationship.

  1. rememberwhaturlookingatisme said: Awesome reply.
  2. polycule posted this